What the future holds.

I am currently booking the next Rock Cancer Out Benefit that I host up here in the cities. Things are looking pretty good two bands have confirmed to the bill and they are pretty freaking sweet. The Hunting Club and Dallas Orbiter are the two confirms. I am currently waiting to hear back from two other to try and have the bill rounded out and get the fliers together and promote this thing around town.

The other news is that next week Tuesday I go into the doctor to get a chest x-ray not a CAT scan done. Then I see the Dr.Maddaus who was the Thoracic surgeon. He is going to have me do a few tests such as lifting things and movements to see the extent of the damage. Then he is going to be giving me a letter with restrictions and an OK to go back to work.....where ever that may be. I know his assistant told me to think the second or third week of December to be back and getting into the swing of things at work. I am pretty scared to go and have this x-ray done. They want to x-ray done to see how and if anything is growing back. If everything goes as well as can be (and I have been pretty lucky with those so far) nothing should show up. If there is something that shows up then there is a problem and we will be back and testing the waters all over again. I haven't really told my friends when I am going in again because I still have that little hint of bad luck that seems to follow me around. That and knowing that the cancer pretty much never leaves the body scares the hell out of me. That will always be in my mind. The way I figure it right now is that I beat it and I am done with this whole thing. Still doesn't take away from the fact that I am freaking terrified to do the tests and x-ray.

I know I have given shout outs to people but I am going to give out a nice long list of people and reasons for a few of them. There are quite a bit of people I lumped in to a group but everyone knows who they are.

Obviously, I have to say my parents and family. Take about handling a major situation and not backing down one bit. I know where I get my stubbornness and arrogance from. Yes, a bit overbearing at moments and that is something that really helped me to push and get things over with. Sorry it's true! Having all of them telling me to handle everything my way and don't let anyone tell me otherwise was actually a huge relief. Especially since I was going to be doing it anyways. Having that support system was a major relief.

W-house and crew in Madison. What an amazing group of people. Not one of them allowed myself to get down and out. Which is a common occurance with people their second time through. Having them keeping me active and running around kept my mind clear believe me. That and getting a bit crazy always helps out. They also look wonderful in cardnal red.

Kerry I need to thank you for getting me on mangosteen juice. I believe it did help me out in many ways.

Jay and E-rock for being the life of the party at the Janesville and West Allis benefits. Talk about out of left field support from you guys and that is awesome.

My former and current co-workers at CB&K and Gustave Larson. Just the checking in on me and asking questions is something that helped me clear my mind a bit. I'll see some of you guys soon.

Traci V. for taking in a homeless feller..... lol wino

The Hope Lodge people for being just that cool.

Michelle for looking me straight in the eyes at Luckys and telling me "You are to strong lose this fight". Certain things like that from other strong people are things I could not forget along this journey.....Currently, I think she was and is right but at that time I thought she was a bit nuts.

Chris Peters for just being that guy. Who doesn't love a good ol rock show benefit? That and making me go to the gym everyday and busting my ass. I also must say that he is pretty swell. My favorite quote from him was that I was too pretty to let cancer beat me. I laughed my ass off for a while after that one.

The oncologist that told me to accept the fact that there is no real help in sight for me. That would be Dr.Skubitz. Real motivating factor for me to prove his smug ass wrong.

My Minneapolis crew for still being the same kick ass people since the day I left the second time. hahaha. Everyone of them are different but all rule the same. It really showed at the benefit up here in the cities. The flock of people I knew that came out was amazing. The bands and artists that I know and deal with in town even showed up. Helps to know my wonderful self was missed just a bit.

Those crazy crazy Eau Claire people. Nothing changes there and they are all egging me on to do the impossible. They were there the first time and probably know me better than most so it was funny because it was almost like "oh, he is sick again? eh, he can do it a second time. so what else is new?" Honestly it was quite refreshing.

Joanne, Heather, and Amber for messaging, commenting, and e-mailing me. All of that advice and suggestions were taking to heart trust me.

I must say that I have to give the Brewers a shout out for giving me the joy to watch a playoff game while doped out on some major narcotics while in the hospital. Even though they stunk it up I did see one victory and that was more than the Cubs got.